Saturday, June 24, 2006

A Bold Move of Progress and Equitism!

I just returned from the Generating Convention of the Christ's Reforming Unifying Diaconate of the Prebystery Episcopated Church (CRUDPEC). Truly godde has done a new thing in the church that s/he/it has greatly blessed!

We in CRUDPEC pride ourselves in making the greatest strides towards true justice, more so than that backward lot in the Episcopate Church (TEC) or the arch-fundamentalist United Christ's Church. While those uncontested bastions of medievalism are barely starting to hear of the bold rejection of gender distinctions boldly proclaimed by Testostercone, the spirit of God/dess has passed over them and given us a bold new thing.

We have elected +Pollywannacracker to be the first avian Presiding Bishop of any denomination! The vote was overwhelming and affirmative, as we had shedded the last of the reactionary zealots that insist on a human-only ordination. No one had yet dared acheived such an act of inclusionary justice, although sibling group, the Revolutionary Catholic Church in Cleveland, had previously allowed the ordination of Fido+, a loving Labrador, as a priest. However, we have further broken down the barriers of species for Christ/a's transgressive love.

After chirping a beautiful liturgy, our new Presiding Bishop-elect addressed those assembled with a stirring charge: "Pretty Bird!" Indeed, we have given the pretty bird to the Church Universal as a gift. Of course, those fundamentalists that control all the other mainline denominations still insist on making distinctions between anything (human/unhuman, male/female/ect, progressive/reactionary, right/left) and will be slow to awaken to this new thing. And those bearers of the banner of Trinitarianism and Crusade at Biola University will no doubt consider this quite funny. But, in truth, it is the Pretty Bird of the Holy Spirit who laughs over them all.

2 Comments:

At 1:52 AM, Blogger Double Oh Somewhat said...

I personally am a big fan of Fido, though I do hear from folks at the RCCC that he isn't quite "sanctuary trained".

 
At 2:58 PM, Blogger Parthinades Quandri said...

Those are but the rumors of canophobes, I hear. Still, the chancel floor is lined with newspaper, just to be safe.

 

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